Every Idle Word

~ A word by itself may seem harmless. Without impact. However, the tone and use of a word can have great impact and cause irreparable harm ~ talkswitheve

Every idle word you have ever spoken has left some impact on the receiver. The impact may be positive or negative. How an idle word is received, depends on numerous factors, including the state of mind of the receiver.

Our current stay-at-home situation due to COVID-19, may be difficult for those who struggle with mental health. They are not able to go to work or socialize to break up the monotony of being at home. However, unaware of their struggle, you may unwittingly say something off-putting to them. Every idle word you say may cause them to struggle even more.

Or you may be the person impacted by an idle word. Have you ever had an issue you are struggling with and reach out to someone you trust? You do not expect them to give you the answer. But another’s perspective could give you some clarity on your situation. However, without thought, they hit you with an idle word. I have experienced such a situation – in the moment it is crushing. Every idle word from a friend puts your relationship in jeopardy.

Have you ever given thought to any of the words you say to another? Or do you just speak in response when you are in a conversation?

What is an idle word?

What is an idle word? Many times without even being aware of it we say idle words. In general, an idle word is one spoken without any thought or careful consideration, of how it would be received. An idle word is an empty word – meaningless.

It could be an empty promise – in the moment to make someone feel better – telling someone you will be there for them. But will you really? Do not make a promise you are not able to keep. Your word means a lot to the recipient.

It could be gossip – there is a difference between talking about another’s personal (and private) business and just having a conversation. An idle word in this situation is one that cannot be substantiated as being true. Someone venting, however, needs to be supported but the conversation should remain private and confidential.

Or it could be words that “slip” out while angry – followed later by an apology that the words did not mean anything. The words may be forgiven, but will never be forgotten because of how they made the receiver feel in the moment.

Avoid idle words

Growing up, it was burned in my brain that if you could not say something nice you should not say anything at all. Did you experience similar lessons?

Words are very powerful. We believe words spoken to us in our younger years, and they become part of our thinking and our self-talk in our adult years.

We have all been on both sides of idle words – we have received and dished out words that are harmful and painful. Relationships are damaged by every idle word. You can avoid idle words. How? Be mindful of your words.

Be mindful of your words

Thinking about, and choosing your words as you speak is how you can be mindful of your words. Refrain from reacting and instead choose to respond. I live my life by using myself as a measure. I only use positive words that I would say to myself.

I treat others in the way I want to be treated. So I am open, and use words of appreciation, which I feel is the simplest way to be mindful of your words.

Think before you communicate.

*Important: For anyone struggling with social distancing, there is a toolkit available that can provide you with some guidance and resources.